Empathy. You know it when you feel it.  The moment another soul connects with you and you KNOW that you are seen, heard and witnessed in all your imperfect humanity.

You are recognized and accepted just as you are without any rankling ounce of pity.

I am not a fan of pity. Don’t want it, don’t give it.

But empathy…..well, empathy is MAGIC.

One of the surest balms for the soul we ever experience.

It is the understanding and ability to share the feelings of another.

I bet you know people who try to fake this, but you have built in radar, don’t you?

As a natural empath and alchemist, I’m here to tell you the single biggest key to increasing excellence in empathy as we explore the letter “E” in A to Z alchemy.

The most important key to excellent empathy is a willingness to be vulnerable.  So vulnerable that you are willing to have your heart broken.  And this, my dear, requires a special breed of courage. 

I can honestly say my clients break my heart.

After 23 years, it happens over and over again.

Emotional pain, physical pain, spiritual pain, you name it.

They bring it, I feel it in the most outstandingly uncomfortable ways.  It is not pleasant.  It is difficult to breathe through.  Some people would run the other way.

But you know what?

It gets better.

Because I know, consistently, when we connect in this deeply honest way, there is a way through. The magic of alchemy happens.  And, in the end, we both emerge renewed, refreshed, healed.

Like the phoenix we rise up again with hearts ready to take on the world.

Interested in learning more? Check out the best primer I know from Dr. Brené Brown. She reminds us we can only create a genuine empathic connection if we are brave enough to be in touch with our own fragilities. It’s short, sweet, elucidating – alchemy all wrapped up in one brilliant video:

Beautiful, right?

Want more? Greater Good of Berkely has a fantastic article on empathy that is more than worth the time it takes to read.

What are your experiences with empathy – giving or receiving? I’d love to hear the alchemy it’s created in your life!