Basic Human Pleasures
I’m not scared by a person’s pain.
Do I feel it?
Do I care?
Do I trust the process?
Where there is pain, there is life as surely as when there is joy. And where there is life, there is space for healing.
It is deadness that frightens me.
Today I honor a client of mine who walked in the door as numb as I’ve ever seen another human being. No visible spark. No pain, no happiness, no words. Sitting on my sofa looking at me…through me…as though I almost wasn’t there. As though she had already given up and was nearly in another world.
I fussed inside my head – about what to do – how to help – asking where the BLEEP was her spark?!
So I did the usual protocol…asked the standard questions…made sure safety nets were in place….and then I went out on a limb and asked:
“What are your favorite things? What do you love to see, to feel, to taste, to touch, to smell?”
Barely blinking, she looked at me.
She closed her eyes.
She said, ”Nothing…..”
I challenged: “Really? Nothing? There must be something you have taken pleasure in at some point in your life.”
She opened her eyes and said the magic words….”There is one thing….”
I barely breathed as I searched her face, “Yes?”
“Pumpkin pie. I used to love the taste of pumpkin pie.”
A wave of relief washed over me. “Done! Do you know what I’m going to do?”
“I’m going to bake you a pumpkin pie. And next time you come in I’m going to give it to you.
The Whole Thing. And you are going to take it home with one rule.”
“You need to savor it. And don’t share it with anyone unless you really, really want to. Eat it slowly – a little bit each day until the next session – and taste every bite.”
And THAT is what began the remarkable process of transformation of the woman who now enters my office with bear hugs for everyone and an impish smile.
Is her life perfect?
Oh Heavens no!
Is it a hell of a lot better?
Oh my, YES!
Magic of the heart is this simple.
So, tell me, what is the single most basic pleasure YOU have taken comfort in? What has brought you one true moment of warmth, peace, relaxation, happiness or strength? And what would you be willing to commit to bringing back into your life that you have left along the way? One thing you love. One thing that wakes up part of you that’s sleeping.
Maybe it’s time.
I KNOW you’re worth it.